Christmas Eve
It's Christmas Eve and here I am, typing away in front of the computer while watching a Christmas movie, drinking coffee, and eating an apple pie. I must admit, it doesn't feel like Christmas to me at all. I don't know if it's adulthood or the fact that a lot has changed over the years or it's just the way it is nowadays.
Our family never had big Christmas traditions and we used to prepare more for the New Years, but we still used to do things together. I remember going to mass on Christmas Eve, then coming home to prepare the food, and waiting for the clock to strike midnight so we can finally eat Noche Buena. Then, on Christmas day, we would wake up early to visit relatives and spend the whole day opening gifts, eating and just having fun with everyone. That used to feel simple, but now that a lot has changed and I'm spending this night writing a blog post that no one would probably read anyway, I miss that.
I miss helping out mom with whatever she's cooking. I miss making the refrigerated cake that I always demand we should have. I miss refusing to eat dinner because I want to eat A LOT during noche buena. I miss doing everything just so I don't fall asleep before midnight. I miss feeling the Christmas spirit.
I'm thinking, maybe I need a new Christmas tradition. No, actually, I want a new Christmas tradition. Honestly, if I could have it my way, or if I have enough money and courage, I would be away for the holidays. But I can't afford to do that yet. Maybe in the coming years? Or maybe in the near future I will find new traditions and not feel like I want to do that anymore. Until then, I will just have to go with whatever happens around me. Tonight, I'm spending Christmas Eve sitting on the couch eating apple pie and drinking coffee and I have yet to know how I'll spend Christmas day. And even though I'm not feeling Christmas-y at all, I'm hopeful. I am looking forward to the next year, to the next holidays, to the new traditions I could possibly have.
If anyone's reading this, I hope you're having a wonderful Christmas, keeping your holiday traditions. And if not, I hope you still look at this day as a blessed one and look forward to the future with hope in your heart. Let's believe together that we will have better Christmases in the future.
Our family never had big Christmas traditions and we used to prepare more for the New Years, but we still used to do things together. I remember going to mass on Christmas Eve, then coming home to prepare the food, and waiting for the clock to strike midnight so we can finally eat Noche Buena. Then, on Christmas day, we would wake up early to visit relatives and spend the whole day opening gifts, eating and just having fun with everyone. That used to feel simple, but now that a lot has changed and I'm spending this night writing a blog post that no one would probably read anyway, I miss that.
I miss helping out mom with whatever she's cooking. I miss making the refrigerated cake that I always demand we should have. I miss refusing to eat dinner because I want to eat A LOT during noche buena. I miss doing everything just so I don't fall asleep before midnight. I miss feeling the Christmas spirit.
I'm thinking, maybe I need a new Christmas tradition. No, actually, I want a new Christmas tradition. Honestly, if I could have it my way, or if I have enough money and courage, I would be away for the holidays. But I can't afford to do that yet. Maybe in the coming years? Or maybe in the near future I will find new traditions and not feel like I want to do that anymore. Until then, I will just have to go with whatever happens around me. Tonight, I'm spending Christmas Eve sitting on the couch eating apple pie and drinking coffee and I have yet to know how I'll spend Christmas day. And even though I'm not feeling Christmas-y at all, I'm hopeful. I am looking forward to the next year, to the next holidays, to the new traditions I could possibly have.
If anyone's reading this, I hope you're having a wonderful Christmas, keeping your holiday traditions. And if not, I hope you still look at this day as a blessed one and look forward to the future with hope in your heart. Let's believe together that we will have better Christmases in the future.
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